shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
17 of the Dumbest Defenses Heard in Court
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
These 19 Ladies Love Pegging Their Men
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go