I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
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