Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
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