dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
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