Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize