just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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