About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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