As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
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I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
We told you to go get more fire wood and you came running back with a log that was on fire, not drunk at all.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
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Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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