If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I just had sex on a roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
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