It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
When are your genitals available?
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
Wow I really just sharted up in this Kroger
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
