please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
no you cant smoke seaweed
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
So much Jack, so little girl.
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Randomize
