Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
So vagazzling was a success
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
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