What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Oh god. It's like a broken faucet. My guts sound like a bilge pump clogged with golf balls and cake frosting.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize
