"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
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