So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Nicole vs. Life
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
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i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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