so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
