Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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