Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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