she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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