I got chris browned last night
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
Randomize
