Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I told you when I started the only reason I was gonna coach your kids soccer team was that I could meet all the hot soccer moms. So why are you so mad I slept with your ex?
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
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