Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
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