You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize