i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize