Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
