Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
Who wants vodka and apple sauce
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
