I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Randomize
