I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
My liver just had a heart attack.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
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