dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
If you're that baked in a class full of people that know you're that baked you tend to offer up a peace offering. Its like the burrito of trust! If eaten you are now obligated to help maintain my grades and keep me from falling out of my chair. $3.75 a morning is worth it for that mafia type protection!
It has become abundantly clear why you give me pixie stix when you're drunk now...
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
Randomize
