I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
This morning I woke up in the entrance of a retirement home. Memory fragments from last night: making it rain with the contents of my wallet over the bridge, getting hit by a car, and a lot of running.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
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