You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Sorry I steam cleaned at 1:30 in the morning and that i'm such a drunk dumb child. On the bright side, my carpet has ever looked better.
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