I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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