Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize