DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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