I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
He literally shouted this Viking war cry when he cam. Then as we laid there he sang me the most beautiful rendition of " When Irish Eyes are Smiling". I've never been more confused.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
