we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
