She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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