I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
Randomize
