I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Listen, you need to start thinking with your vagina and not with your heart... That emotional shit is for your 30s.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
