im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
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