You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
