My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
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