honey bunches of taint.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
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I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
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