I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
Randomize
