I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
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As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
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I think this agreement was sent by God. I get to do my own thing, get laid, and he still makes me breakfast in the morning.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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