had no condoms so I just made do with an empty doritos bag.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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