I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
You just kept mumbling about the carpet being covered in stains that looked like the face of God. Until you decided that they were closer in relation to Dumbledore.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
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