I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I was just trying to flirt with James Franco but she kept telling me to take shots out of Ron Burgundy's mouth
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
Randomize
