I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize