You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
Randomize
